I received this in an email and thought that I would share it.
From me ("the wishor") to you ("the wishee"), Please accept without
obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally
conscious, socially responsible, politically correct, low stress,
non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the summer solstice holiday,
practised within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion
of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the
religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice
not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I wish you a financially successful, personally fulfilling and medically
uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar
year 2007, but with due respect for the calendars of choice of other
cultures or sects, and having regard to the race, creed, colour, age,
physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform or sexual
preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting you are bound by these terms that:- This greeting
is subject to further clarification or withdrawal. This greeting is freely
transferable provided that no alteration shall be made to the original
greeting and that the proprietary rights of the wishor are acknowledged.
This greeting implies no promise by the wishor to actually implement any of
the wishes. This greeting may not be enforceable in certain jurisdictions
and/or the restrictions herein may not be binding upon certain wishees in
certain jurisdictions and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wishor.
This greeting is warranted to perform as reasonably may be expected within
the usual application of good tidings, for a period of one year or until the
issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first. The wishor
warrants this greeting only for the limited replacement of this wish or
issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wishor. Any references
in this greeting to "the Lord", "Father Christmas", "Our Saviour", "Rudolph
the Red-nosed Reindeer" or any other festive figures, whether actual or
fictitious, dead or alive, shall not imply any endorsement by or from them
in respect of this greeting, and all proprietary rights in any referenced
third party names and images are hereby acknowledged. This greeting is made
under Australian Law, in the English language.
IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s)
named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or
unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of
humour, or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended
recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not
authorised (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating
social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct
context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or
grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the
transmission of this email. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the
unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed
by reading this warning backwards.
